our little wonderland
by sangkar
Summary: I climbed the ladder of those black-and-white keys, as your fingers danced upon them. -—Or, the tale of two sisters and a song. :: Slightly dark themes.


**our little wonderland  
**-—sangkar

* * *

the game is on

_screaming terror rage heartbreak fury_

but who will win?

_not enough time_

there's a little dusty picture of you and her, together, on the mantelpiece of the old abandoned house you once shared

_how did we descend to this level_

you were four and eight, then

_this isn't happening this isn't happening this isn't happening_

everything that was

_please_

everything that could have been

_oh my god, please_

everything is worthless

_silence is a raging monster_

kronos killed your mother

_memories are fading fast, but i remember the music_

kronos killed your step-brother

_what happened?_

but your sister

_i'm too young_

she wasn't killed

_broken_

she was transformed

_i climbed the ladder of those black-and-white keys, as your fingers danced upon them_

she's a monster

hideous

beautiful

scarred

_you played so beautifully_

green eyes and green hair

_what happened?_

what happened?

_you played with your toys and you laughed and sometimes, sometimes you cried_

poison pulses through her veins, and you can almost see it - dark, dangerous, fatal, angry

_you'd always get up again, in the end, and you'd play with me_

what happened?

_i remember the last song we made together - i was ten_

"i had to do it," she whispers, and you see a flicker of doubt in her evil green eyes

_alice in wonderland, you called it_

"why?" you ask, and she slashes your face with her claws

_it had just four notes in it_

she's gone

_just four notes and you made a whole new world_

mad

_our own little wonderland_

claws, not fingers on her hand

_i don't remember how it goes now_

no more lovely fingers of porcelain, no more delicate notes under her command

_but it was beautiful_

she was lovely, just like her fingers, just like her music

_wonderland_

these broken ballerina fingers - claws - won't make those keys of ivory sing anymore

_the march hare had its own little line_

remember the last time you saw her truly alive?

_as did the cheshire cat and the dormouse and my favourite, the mad hatter_

a dark and stormy night, and a full moon glittering in the inky-black sky

_i hate him now_

"i pledge my alliance to kronos," she whispered, and your soul bled and wept until it could cry no more

_he was eccentric, crazy, insane, but i loved him, because in the end he was good_

you watched her slice her hand and watched her blood drip out, slowly, silently

_but now the mad hatter is truly mad_

and whatever remained of those ballerina fingers and your childhood became

_he creeps into my dreams, sometimes, and he pours boiling tea all over it, and finally he splashes all of it on me and i think i might die_

lost

_but then i wake up_

forgotten

_they put me in a hospital, and __i wore a white gown and i lived in a white room, and some people say the hospital is a prison for the mind, but i loved it_

forever gone

_i would have liked to die there, but then they dragged me to that camp_

"i'm not sorry," she says, and trails her claws along your cheek

_they taught me to fight, they taught me how to survive_

"i know," you reply, and it is now that you shatter into a million pieces

_but advice after injury is like medicine after death, and it is no use saving someone who wants to be dead_

you let her take you, torture you, murder you

_i want my wonderland back_

knives pierce every inch of your body, and you scream, and you smile, and she smiles back

_i want those four magic notes and my old, good, mad hatter, and i want to sing a song with you as your fingers dance along the keys, and i want to be happy_

it's almost

_i am fourteen years old, but i want to be a child again and go to that special place with you, my sister, and never come back_

like you're having your wish come true

_please_

she dances a dangerous tango with you

_i don't know how or where or when it all went wrong_

it's almost

_please_

like she's singing and playing and laughing just like she used to do

_i will never truly know why_

and you want to stay here forever and ever and ever

_it hurts_

pain doesn't matter

_doesn't matter_

it isn't a factor

_please, just let me stay with you forever_

as long as you get your wonderland

_wonderland_

this will not be a perfect replica of the utopia you once shared with her

_the music will be louder and darker and meaner_

but it will do

_but it will be the same four notes_

and the old, good, mad hatter can come with you, too

_the same porcelain fingers dancing a ballet over the sharps and naturals and flats_

a tide of black, a tsunami of darkness, is looming over the horizon

_i will sing with you_

it is going to crash over everything that has ever mattered to you and everything that has ever been yours

_i can learn the music again_

like a black hole

_it'll be like a black hole of happiness for us_

but black holes are gateways to other universes, so they say

_we'll fall in _

so it will be a gateway to your wonderland

_to our wonderland_

and you will play

_and we will play_

and you will dance and sing and laugh

_and we will dance and sing and laugh_

and she will see the error of her ways

_and you will see the error of your ways_

and she'll return

_and you'll return_

and she will stay

_and you will stay_

(with me and our music and our wonderland, forever)

(so you dance that dangerous tango till dawn, until, finally the ocean takes you all)

**Ω**

* * *

**author's notes: **I decided to go lowercase the whole way through for stylistic purposes, not because I cannot English. If you're confused about anything in this story/freeverse/thing, try reading it again. Hopefully it will make more sense then. If it doesn't, drop me a review/PM and I'll do my best to explain :) Also, the line that's in the summary is from The Cat Empire's _Sunny Moon_.


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